One of the hardest parts about being in foster care is trying to keep or make friends. I’ve been through it — the awkward questions, the lies I told to avoid explaining things, and the times I felt like no one really got what I was going through.
So if you’re struggling with friendships right now, this post is for you.
💬 “Do I tell them I’m in care?”
This question comes up a lot. Honestly, you don’t owe anyone your full story. It’s completely up to you. If someone is kind, respectful, and you want them to know, you can share. But you should never feel pressured.
Sometimes I would say my foster mum was my nan and friends didn’t think anything of it. Once you feel comfortable to tell them, then you can just explain you felt comfortable to say before.
🧠 Feeling Different
It’s normal to feel like your life is way more complicated than your friends’. Maybe they complain about their parents, and you’re sitting there thinking, “At least you have yours.”
That can hurt. And it’s okay to feel that.
But remember this: your experiences don’t make you “less than” — they make you stronger, more aware, more compassionate. The right friends will see that.
😶 When Friends Don’t Understand
Some friends won’t get it — and that’s not your fault. People don’t always know what to say, or they make weird comments without meaning to hurt you.
If someone makes you uncomfortable or judges you, that’s not a real friend. You deserve people who respect your story, even if they don’t fully understand it.
🧡 What Real Friends Look Like
- They don’t make you feel ashamed of being in care
- They listen
- They don’t gossip about your situation
- They treat you like you, not just “the foster kid”
Those friends do exist — even if it takes time to find them.
📝 Final Thoughts
Being in care can make friendships complicated, but it doesn’t mean you have to go through it all alone. The right people will accept your story — even if they don’t understand every part of it.
Until then, be kind to yourself. Protect your energy. And remember: you are more than your situation.
FOSTER CHILD TO ANOTHER 